Roses are red, violets are blue, this Valentine’s Day, let's talk sexual health too
Valentine’s Day is often synonymous with romance, grand gestures, and, let’s be honest sex.
The flowers, the chocolates and candlelit dinners all lead up to one thing: intimacy. But while we celebrate love in all its forms, how often do we pause to have the conversations that really matter?
This year, let’s shift the focus. Let’s talk about sexual health because real love means caring for each other’s well-being, inside and out.
Why should we be talking about sexual health on Valentine’s Day?
South Africa has one of the highest rates of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and HIV worldwide.
According to UNAIDS, approximately 7.8 million people in South Africa were living with HIV in 2023, with young women disproportionately affected. In fact, the country remains the epicentre of the global HIV epidemic, with rising STI rates exacerbating the issue.
Dr Anusha Naidoo, an obstetrician and gynaecologist at Mediclinic Sandton, explains that many STIs are asymptomatic, meaning people may unknowingly transmit infections.
“Screening is imperative to identify and treat individuals who may be unaware that they are infected and who would otherwise go undetected. This is an especially pertinent approach for individuals in high-risk groups,” she says.
With the stakes so high, avoiding the topic of sexual health is not an option.
Who is most at risk?
Certain groups are more vulnerable to STIs and HIV transmission, including:
- Men who have sex with men (MSM).
- People with a history of STIs or HIV-positive status.
- Pregnant women.
- Individuals exposed to illicit drug use.
- People who have been in correctional facilities.
- Young adults aged 15–24, who experience the highest rates of new infections
Beyond demographics, behavioural risks also play a role. If you or your partner have had a new sexual partner in the past 60 days, multiple partners, or engage in inconsistent condom use, your risk increases significantly.
The rise of dating apps has also introduced a new layer of risk, making it easier to engage in casual, anonymous sex without prior discussions about sexual health.
The consequences of untreated STIs
Ignoring STIs can lead to long-term health complications, including:
- Infertility.
- Chronic pelvic pain.
- Cervical cancer (linked to HPV).
- Upper genital tract infections.
- Increased vulnerability to HIV infection
In South Africa, cervical cancer is the second most common cancer among women, largely due to untreated HPV infections. While routine Pap smears can detect early abnormalities, many women don’t get screened due to a lack of awareness or healthcare access.
How to protect your sexual health
1. Use Protection and use it correctly
The World Health Organization (WHO) confirms that condoms are one of the most effective ways to prevent STIs, including HIV. Dr. Naidoo stresses that they must be used consistently and correctly.
Proper condom use includes:
- Using a new condom for every sexual act (oral, vaginal, or anal).
- Checking expiration dates.
- Avoiding oil-based lubricants (which can damage latex condoms).
- Handling condoms carefully to prevent tears
Did you know? Female condoms are also available but remain underutilised. They provide an additional layer of protection and can be inserted hours before intercourse.
2. Get vaccinated
Certain STIs, like HPV and hepatitis B, can be prevented through vaccination. The HPV vaccine is highly effective in reducing cervical cancer risk, yet many South Africans remain unaware of its availability.
Unfortunately, there are still no vaccines for chlamydia, gonorrhoea, syphilis, or HIV, making prevention and screening even more critical.
3. Get tested regularly
Routine STI screening is crucial, especially if you have multiple partners or belong to a high-risk group.
Guidelines recommend:
- Annual chlamydia and gonorrhoea testing for women under 25.
- Routine STI screening for pregnant women.
- Frequent testing for men who have sex with men (MSM).
- Immediate testing if your partner has been diagnosed with an STI
Testing is not just about protecting yourself it’s about ensuring the health and safety of your partners too.
Breaking the stigma
Talking about STIs, HIV, and sexual health can feel uncomfortable, but it shouldn’t be. A healthy relationship is built on trust and open communication.
Before becoming intimate with a new partner, having an honest discussion about sexual history and protection should be as normal as talking about favourite foods or weekend plans.
Naidoo emphasises, "Regardless of relationship structure monogamous, open, or polyamorous consistent condom use, open communication, and regular STI testing are key to maintaining sexual health and preventing transmission."
Because of the real turn-on? Knowing you’re both safe, healthy, and protected.
Valentine’s Day shouldn’t come with sexual pressure; it should come with empowered choices. Love is about connection, trust, and mutual respect. And nothing says "I care about you" more than prioritising sexual health and responsibility.